Soaring Back: The once hapless and injury-ridden Detroit Red Wings are soon to melt the ice with their play, as the 11-time Stanley Cup Champions ended March with 6 straight wins, and are 12-2-1 since the Olympic Break. Meanwhile, back in Toronto, the league office is rejoicing after panicking over dreaded Wingless playoff television ratings.
UConn Do it: The Lady Huskies won their 76th straight game last night by 40 points over Florida State, booking yet another Final Four trip, and putting them a couple games back of the Toronto Raptors for the last playoff spot in the NBA.
Bucking Old Habits: In the 17 years of the Pirates long string of losing seasons, they have traditionally placed their pitchers in the nine spot, but this year is different however, as the Buckos plan on slotting Zach Duke & Co. in the 8-hole. According to Pirates brass, the move is to ensure a winning season in Miley Cyrus's lifetime.